How I know I’m a grown up now: I like to watch the local news. Today, I realized how interesting it is astrologically. It’s a fascinating study, picking the archetypes out of the headlines. Some really juicy ones today.

Today’s chart features Jupiter – Neptune – Chiron in what I have been calling the “detox” stellium in Aquarius. Jupiter conjunct Neptune exact in the wee hours of tomorrow morning. Mars is separating from a square to it, and the Moon hits it tomorrow.

Check out today’s headlines for intrigues large and small:

A real life CSI episode: Charlottesville area man is on trial for a murder that happened 20 years ago. Retried on DNA evidence from a cigarette butt found at the scene. Charlottesville has been known to have an interesting murder trial or two.

Holy smoke! Two SW Virginia firefighters charged with setting fire to 7 abandoned homes and barns between the end of March and last Friday, July 3. Suspects tracked by secret (Neptune) GPS (Aquarius). Mars— fire square deception (Neptune), and ultimately, the law (Jupiter).

Charlottesville Schools soon to get $3M in federal stimulus funds. Will use it to create temporary jobs for much needed programs. Temporary? Is this a good idea?

SECOND STIMULUS? Oh my god, the news outlets are freaking out. (Neptune, fear. Jupiter, all blown up.)

I hardly think conservatives in this country are in a position to be schooling the rest of us on economics right now. I know the economics 101 argument. Your way hasn’t worked. Anyway, it takes time to distribute this much money. You don’t just hand over a check like Paulson did with the bailout last year. Thus, the money is just beginning to hit the economy. (See above.) The public health option is going to be great for business. Health insurance is a huge, burdensome expense for businesses right now. Don’t get me started… Anyway.

Is this Cyberwar? Neptune in Aquarius, infection in the computers. Viruses and server attacks galore, coming out of Asia. (Mars, planet of attacks separating from a square to Jupiter Chiron Neptune in Aquarius— sign of the internet). What’s going on here? Who’s attacking the government’s computer systems? How much harm could they do? Is the financial system vulnerable? (Saturn-Pluto-Uranus T-square coming in 2010)

Riots in China as Mars squared the detox stellium over the weekend. Bummer. Learn about Xinjiang…, so much like Tibet.

Former Goldman Sachs employee apprehended after making off with GS’s trading formulas (Neptune in Aquarius— deception in computers). FBI springs into action and finds the guy. The FBI, really? This one intrigues my inner conspiracy theorist.

No effing way: Loser scumbags dig up graves at historic black cemetery in Chicago. Then dispose of the bodies and try to resell the plots. Jupiter-Chiron, big ouch. Neptune, deception & thieving. Much love to the families.

Brantley reports: Weather has been unusually (Aquarius) cool and Neptuney (wet) around here these days. The Pisces Moon may bring us a good soaking this weekend. Have you noticed it tends to be more humid when the Moon is in Pisces?