Anima writes:

Hi, I would like to know your opinion on this:
my contender (the other woman involved in this triangle: I-him-her) has transit Saturn natal Pluto next year in June. In this moment she has transit Pluto opposition natal Sun, exact, and he is moving out the house. next year, in October, she has transit Saturn opposition Moon.
He had, till May last year transit Saturn square Venus and after Saturn square Moon, when they had tremendous marriage crisis, and immediately after he met me. His Progressed Moon entered in Scorpio (by the way he is double Scorpio, Venus in Scorpio), In February he has Progressed Moon conjunction Asc, then conjunction Venus and later Sun, which should be the new beginning (he is entering in new apartment in March). Then, in May, his progressed Moon is in the opposition to natal Moon in the Seventh house.
When I met him, I’ve had transit Saturn trine Venus and his Uranus in transit (I am an Aquarian!!!) entered his 5th house. We were suppose to move in together, but the (ex?) wife is very aggressive, emotionally blackmailing him, so he cancelled this and is moving alone for the time being to think away from two women, if there is a chance to save his marriage.
I will have the second time Saturn trine Venus in April.
I would like to know your opinion what are my chances to win this battle?

Anima,

This “battle” may not have any winners at all. At least not in the way I see it. It’s a crisis between two people who have a lot more history than you do with him. My question is, what is it about you that makes you ok with being involved in a tug-of-war with another woman over a man? If I really wanted this man, I would back waaaay off and let things settle. But I have Venus in Taurus. You must have Venus in either Aries or Sagittarius. My guess is Aries. And that begs the question, where is he in all of this? You sound more interested in “winning” him than loving him. How are you supporting him by fighting over him? Do you think your presence adds to or subtracts from the confusion and turmoil in his life? Are you habitually drawn into this kind of drama?

The best possible outcome of a transit Saturn trine Venus is not “winning” a man. It’s taking advantage of opportunities to grow and become more responsible, more mature and grounded about your priorities and relationships. If this kind of drama happens when Saturn trines Venus, I don’t want to think about what happens when Saturn squares or opposes it. You may have some hard lessons coming.

And what exactly would you “win”, if you indeed “won”? A relationship born of the fires of war, with a man fresh out of a painful marriage, who hasn’t had time to settle, heal and and figure out who he is and what went wrong. Hardly an ideal setup for a successful future. That progressed Moon transit through his first house is about taking time by himself to start a new life, and sort out who he is and what he wants.

I think you should embrace the lesson here. Learn it now, so you won’t have to meet it in a more difficult way later. Do the responsible thing and let go. Realize he may or may not go back to his marriage, and make your peace with that. Lovingly let him know you are going to give him ample breathing room, so that his life can stabilize and he can find his own rhythm. And keep your promise. If it’s meant to be, you’ll be together after things settle. But for you to have peace, I think you need to be ok with removing yourself from this very unhealthy dynamic and letting the chips fall where they may.

That’s my opinion.